Friday, May 29, 2009

Life in the SLOW lane,

This Is a Shout Out.
(SHOUTTT OUTTT)
To my parents,
Dear Mommy and Daddy that I love so dearly.
I have been living my life in the slow lane.
Even worse to this is that my favorite quote is
"The only thing I hate worse than watching something be done wrong, is watching it be done SLOWLY"
Now. To my point.
I have had my permit for about a year now.
Driving with you in the car and listening to your boring radio stations where I have to listen to music that kills my eardrums.
That really does get old.
But what is worse is that all my friends have their licenses!!
The only way of transportation that I have is my feet. Let me tell ya' my feet aren't that great.
I have been jogging 4 miles to my best friends houses and back everytime I want to go.
I have lost SO MUCH WEIGHT FROM THIS!!!!
Its no bueno.
I should go on a hunger strike untill you let me get my license, but I wont. Sadly, because I love food. Its kind of a big deal. Just like me. Don't hate:)
But I took both tests already, so how come you wont let me walk into the DMV and take my picture so that I can wave my license around in peoples faces!!!??? Is it that hard?
STORY TIME
SO ... when I took both my tests, I kind of realized that nobody on the road should be driving.
The test was SO EASY.
Example question.
"what to you do if a child jumps out into the street when your driving?"
A. Swerve into traffic
B. Hit the child and keep going
C. Yell "100 Points!" and write it down on a notepad to tell all your friends
D. Stop and give the child the right of way.
(I secretly wanted to chose C. I laughed when I thought about it, but then the creepy smelly guy next to me looked at me weird).
Talk about an akward moment................................................................
MY DRIVING TEST TEST TEST TEST.
I was really nervous because my dads ROVER is pretty much impossible to drive and my dad is pretty much Will Ferrell so I'm always laughing around him, I took it in Sugar City and I don't even know where that is anymore, and I had to put a box of peanuts behind my back so that i could push the gas pedal.
So I meet the guy. He's pretty cool.
But then something terrible starts happening.
He started asking me where certain buttons were. I don't know where the buttons for the windshield are!! The only way I turn those on is if its an accident and i start freaking out.
Luckly my dad pointed to them for me, idk why. but he did. (Thanks DAD)!
So after thats over, we start to drive,
we were at a grocery store so I was pulling out of the parking lot, ( I had just watched Star Trek minutes before this, so I pretty much thought I could command the Land Rover to drive for me... Didn't work out so well)
While I was dazed off thinking about naming the car and letting it drive for me, I was interupted by yelling... It was my dad. He's always yelling so, I Kind of ignored him
Until......
I realized that I was centimeters away from HITTING A CAR!!!!
Luckly, I figured out what I was doing and decided to drive like a normal human being without pointed ears from star trek.. "snicker snicker giggle giggle". and I got to watch my dad cover his mouth trying not to bust out histerically laughing the rest of the way.
This story probably didn't help out my case, but It was entertaining and I should get an A for effort!!!
MOM DAD.
Please let me get my license:)